(I wrote this as a salute to the effect he had on me and quite a few others after seeing and hearing Mr. A at last year’s Hobbit press conference ~)

There are some who eschew guys who pass up a razor,
Preferring a clean-shaven face.
As for me, I don’t agree.

I don’t think it’s so weird to fancy a gent with a beard;
Facial hair—oooh, that air of masculinity!
That alpha maleness lurking in the vicinity
Of a handsome hirsute face
makes one’s heart quicken its pace . . .
(Downy-cheeked lads just lack a certain—virility.)

And when the beard that’s sprouting out
Graces not some average lout
But Our Man who outshines all the rest of ‘em. . .
Hip, hip hooray! Oh, glorious day!
Mr. A, you rock that beard, I have to say.

When we first caught a glimpse of The Hirsuteness
Bearded Beauty extraordinaire,
what gorgeousness was there!
What a sexy, sexy beast we saw in you, my dearest Armitage . . .

At that table you dominated,
For your words our breath was bated,
as we waited, anticipated the Bearded Beaut.
(You sexy brut!)

Still, just watching gave us pleasure—
The Little Black Shirt encased our Biceped Treasure
Sitting so still and so attentive as others chattered.

And when your question came,
(darling girl, why a query so—lame??)
Sexy Rich, you did not disappoint us.
Deep blue eyes flashed ‘neath bold brows
Deep, dark voice, tinged with a growl!
White teeth gleamed–that wolfish smile–
Crinkled brow, that teasing style—
Hearts palpitated for quite a while . . .

The Bearded Beaut, a bit flirtatious,
a bit sarcastic, a little dang’rous,
You proved your point, proved it so well—
Such gravitas! Such—regal-ness—

You owned the room,
You wowed the geeks! They must confess . . .
That PJ’s Pick has the finesse
To strut his stuff (OMG, you’re really BUFF! But I digress . . .)

As alpha dwarf, you’ll reign supreme!
The finest dwarf Middle-Earth’s ever seen.
O Bearded One, you I adore,
And when you shave that chin once more
And bid farewell to your lovely beard,
Some will likely feel a little blue, ‘tis true,
For the beard has grown on us,
As well as you.
(But it looks better on you . . .)

(photos/screencaps courtesy of RANet)

More RA Poetry: The Bearded Beauty

35 responses »

  1. Angie, you’re pretty close to convincing me that RA looks glorious with his beard!! 😉 You know I’m more the clean-shaven lover. For me he can radiate his masculinity with his stance and relaxed attitude, with his brooding looks and his smiles and laughter and naturally with his gorgeous eyes. He wowed us all! However your lovely poem is teasingly flirtatious and irresistible, just like the man himself… On the other hand, thinking of Guy with his stubble…..Oh geez!
    BTW you’re a more than bustling writer! I’m having a fairly hard time keeping pace with your luxuries! 🙂

    • LInda, Angie’s converted me into an RA beard lover, having not been a beard fan before myself! Such are her powers! 🙂 Cheers, Angie!:)

    • No pun intended, but that beard really does grow on you. 😉 And I think the Recognise photo shoot really makes the most of the look.

      The truth, he can pull off just about any look re his facial hair. What I think the beard shows is yet another look he can wear that might broaden the number/type of roles available . Just a thought.

      Re the posts, of course, it helps that the poems are pieces I wrote a while back so all I had to do was cut and paste. I have spent a considerable amount of time laboriously looking through photos *cough* but what’s a dedicated blogger to do? ;). .

  2. Angie, I love your poem and I LOVE your sense of humour! Now. Look at pic.#2 and tell me Martin Freeman didn’t have a “guy crush” on Richard!!!! That’s a look of adoration! Or am I mistaken?
    Also, can someone tell me what the 1st question to Richard was at the press conf? To which he replied “can you be a bit more specific, I’ve got 40 years to talk about” ? I watched and re-watched but couldn’t decipher anything. Thanks for your help! 🙂

    • 😀 Glad you enjoyed. I like to think my sense of humor is one of my best qualities. Well, if any man was deserving of being the object of a “man crush,” it’s the Bearded Beaut.

      The interviewer basically said, “Tell us about yourself.” Very wide-open and vague question.
      You can see why Richard asked if she could be more specific! 😉 (It is hard to hear–I don’t think there was a microphone near her or it there was, it didn’t work too well).

      • Thanks Angie! Gosh,I hate that question! I went out on a date with a guy about a 1000 years ago who asked me the exact same question. I just froze on the spot, had absolutely no clue what what to say, where to start! Needless to say there was no second date after that. But Richard handled it beautifully.
        I bet a lot of gay men are in love with him too…

        • I would have thought a professional would have been a little more prepared with a few facts about each of the actors to aid in asking questions. And if she knew nothing at all, she could have asked something like, “Which of your previous roles do you feel best prepared for tackling Thorin?” And he could have talked about his experiences in sword fighting and horseback riding on RH . . . it would have narrowed it down from 40 years. 😉

          • Another daft question for me was when they asked him “why do you think you’re suited for this role”? To which he rightly replied, well you should ask the director that! So quick and clever our Richard! 🙂

  3. I remember the first time I watched the press conference and how blown away I was to see him with a full beard. It was a bit of a shock, but as Angie has said, it “grows” on you!! It certainly has on me and pictures from the Recognize Mag photo-shoot move me more than a lot of others do, much as I have loved them. I find myself quite overcome by his masculine beauty and somehow the beard seems to add to that even though I’m not normally drawn to beards per se! Richard has somehow changed all that!! 🙂

    If I had not already been impressed by how he conducted himself at interviews and such this would have done it. I was rather disappointed that the sound quality was so poor as far as the questions were concerned and the fact that some of the guys kept talking didn’t help.. It was obvious that even he had a hard time hearing what was being asked! They took such a long time to get round to talking to him I’m sure the questioner could have come up with something more intelligent to ask him. But as usual he was gracious, polite and even a little flirty with that twinkle in his eye!! Maybe I shouldn’t be too hard on her. Just being in the same room as him might have rendered me speechless, particularly in that tight little black shirt which showed off that amazing physique to perfection! 😉 Enough to make anyone a little short of breath!!

    He impressed me even more by the gravitas he displayed while some of the others were a bit too talkative for my liking! But he obviously surprised his fellow actors when he admitted that his first time on stage had been in a production of The Hobbit. Someone even remarked that he had kept that quiet! Not one to blow his own trumpet, is he? That was in November of 1986 and he was all of 15 years old at the time! His beloved Miss Pat obviously recognized his potential even then!! I’m sure she would have been SO thrilled if she had lived to see how far he has come!! 😀

    • Teuchter, you’re right, we shouldn’t be so hard on the lady journalist… How can you expect a woman to be coherent in the presence of His Royal Gorgeousness? I’m sure I would not have been able to speak at all, let alone ask him an intelligent question! 🙂

      • Miss Pat was the headmistress at Pattinson College where he studied drama along with music and dance. He recorded a wonderful piece to be used as part of Miss Pat’s eulogy when she passed away ( he was away and not able to attend the funeral). She obviously made a big impression on his life.

        • Thanks, Angie. Wow, you really are a fountain of RA knowledge! I still have a lot of catching-up to do! 🙂 I’m sure Miss Pat was a fantastic lady, God rest her soul. The world owes her a debt of gratitude for playing an important role in RA’ s formative years.

          • Sometimes it’s a little scary that I do know this much about RA . . . 😉 I think the text of Richard’s memories about Miss Pat are in the archives at RANet. You know, his mom went back to work so the Armitages could afford to send him to the school after he expressed interest in furthering his education in the arts. It seems they were very supportive of their son and saw the potential in him. And Miss Pat was one of those who helped foster that potential. Sometimes I just want to give a huge thank you to all the people who played a part in making him the actor and the human being he is today. 😀

          • Hopefully, one day in the not too distant future RA’ll be able to pay tribute to Miss Pat and his family and all the others who helped him, in his Oscar acceptance speech! 🙂 (Won’t be for The Hobbit though I fear)

          • Angie, I don’t think it’s scary that you know so much, after all you’ve been a fan of RA for years, and you know things about him that he was willing to share publicly somewhere along the way so I think it’s just fine. 🙂

            • I am also a voracious reader and, as I think I already mentioned, a collector of trivia, so I have a lot of info floating around in my head and I might as well share it. And yes, it is all public info–I haven’t been going through his trash or anything like that LOL

  4. I watched all official The Hobbit production videos last night and the sheer scale of the project is just overwhelming! I don’t think I have seen Peter Jackson being interviewed before but he seems like a very amiable,enthusiastic,unpretentious guy. I’m sure he and RA have a great working relationship! 🙂

  5. Pingback: Laughter and pure sexiness. How can we not love him? « the armitage effect

  6. Pingback: For Charlotte & fellow RA beard lovers . . . hirsute goodness « the armitage effect

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