What and who I want Richard Armitage to be.


I want Richard Armitage to be fulfilled–in terms of his work, I want him to be cast in the kinds of roles he truly desires to play, to be able to dig into characters he finds intriguing, juicy, an exciting challenge that will flex his acting muscles.



I want him to keep finding satisfaction in practicing his craft. If he chooses to go into directing, writing and producing at some point, I am all for that, too–although, selfishly, I hope he never chooses to leave acting behind altogether.  He’s much too good at it.

I also want him to be happy and satisfied in his personal life. He believes in nourishment and nurturing; I want Richard to have friends, family, lovers who give him the nourishing and nurturing he so richly deserves.  People with whom he feels truly at home, no matter where his career may take him, because they are always there in his heart.

I want Richard Armitage to know he has many, many admirers who appreciate him for all he has given us, and not just through his performances.  We appreciate all the stage door appearances, no matter what the weather, all those autographs signed, photos posed for and happy moments provided when fans get to look directly into those beautiful eyes and be on the receiving end of one of those stellar smiles.  He speaks so kindly of us in interviews and never seems to take his little community for granted.  I don’t want him to ever feel he owes his fandom a thing, except, perhaps, to bring his best to his roles–and he hasn’t failed me yet.



Yes, I want Richard to be happy, satisfied, fulfilled in all facets of his life, to keep learning and growing and being the special human being that he is; to love and to be loved.

I want Richard to be himself. Bright, talented, funny, thoughtful, kind, generous, talented, versatile, and just a little mysterious.  To reveal what he choses to reveal, and to keep private that which he chooses to keep to himself. It’s his right and privilege as a fellow human being.

I consider myself most fortunate to have been his admirer for seven years, seven years of experiencing masculine beauty coupled with an amazing and always evolving talent, a delightful sense of humor and a gentle and humble spirit.

What he brings into my life is more than enough for me, and I regularly say, “Thank you, God, for creating such a wonder as Richard Armitage.”



“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image.  Otherwise, we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.

~ Thomas Merton: No Man is an Island


70 responses »

  1. One of those moments when I want to say, “I wish I had written that!” More than perfect and something I needed to read while going through a period of ill health. I wish he knew how many people have found he can do wonders for our well-being. I continually thank God for him and what he has brought to my life these past many years.

    • So sorry to hear you’ve been ill, Teuchter *hugs* Still trying to figure out what is up with my wrist. Third visit to doctor in Montgomery this week. RA really is good medicine and a real blessing. A ray of sunshine! Feel better soon.

  2. A new fan here but I definitely second all that you have stated. I feel like I have known him for a long time and always pray for him and wish him every best that life can offer. He has brought a ray of sunshine to my life when I needed it very much and for that I will be always thankful. He is a special, special human being. Thank you for these lovely sentiments fedoralady!

    • Thanks so much, June, I appreciate it. It’s odd how once RA is part of your life, it almost feels as if he’s been there forever, and it’s hard to imagine life without him in it. ❤ I also pray for him and send positive vibes his way quite often.

    • Thank you, Helen. The Merton quote is a keeper. I have to go back to the doc next Wednesday to see what the MRI told us or didn’t tell us and whether my next step is to see an orthopedic surgeon (here in town, thankfully, not a 100-mile round trip but a quarter of that).

  3. Beautifully written Angie – once again, your words reflect my thoughts perfectly (it’s as if you have a direct line into my head lol!) The quote at the end is perfect too.
    Richard gives us so much of himself through his work and the opportunities that his fans have had to connect with him (the stage door experience and his messages to us for example) He does not owe us any more than that.

    • Thank you so much, Sara. I have to confess I teared up a little when I went back and read over what I wrote. The best writing does give rise to some emotion, I believe. And his birthday is right around the corner, isn’t it? 😀

    • Well, I only set out to try to honestly express my own feelings here, but it is gratifying to know I got it right for some other fans, too, Kelbel. Thank you for your kind words. ❤

    • Thank you, Cill. I am not sure if it’s my age, or the way I was brought up, or my own life experiences–probably a mixture of all of the above–but I just can’t let myself think someone I support as a fan or admirer or whatever somehow “owes” me. It’s simply not logical or fair to me. I suppose that is why I have been so bemused to hear about some of the recent kerfluffles in the fandom. *smh*

      • Sadly I too lack the sense of entitlement that would let me spread rumors about people to gossip sites or harass their family members or paper their neighborhoods with urls of fansites when they weren’t forthcoming with admissions or information I wanted.

        • LOL I wish you would tell me how you REALLY feel, Cill. I don’t know—I just have zero desire to do some sort of investigative work trying to ferret out all of RA’s secrets. I mean, my own life keeps me busy enough trying to sort out health issues and build a business and have a family life with hubby and pets. And unless something turns out that would absolutely outrage me, like oh, he’s actually a child molester/serial killer/tortures animals in his spare time, there’s nothing that could come to light that would make me stop liking/admiring/respecting Richard Armitage. And that includes the sex of the person with whom he might be sleeping. It just doesn’t matter.

          • I am glad that you recognize my reticence. I am often accused of being unclear in my opinions 😀

            But ftr, I was actually referring to a number of actual examples of things done to different celebrities examples including 1Direction, the actors from Supernatural and various lotr actors over the past 10 years.

            • I appreciate your candidness. I know, I find it personally appalling the lengths people will go to “know all” about particular celebs. It doesn’t help when you have so-called celebrities (Kardashians and Jenners, I am lookin’ at YOU!) who share virtually everything and then continue to do it with their children—serving as their pimps, basically. It makes me glad this is happening to RA as a mature, experienced grown man rather than someone still wet behind the ears. I think it’s a little easier to deal with. Bless him.

              One thing about Supernatural—which I started watching in reruns on TNT a while back and got hooked—the scriptwriters haven’t shied away from slyly and humorously touching on fan mania, those shipping the brothers as a couple, etc.

              • J2 have been accused of playing up to the fans and then getting upset when the fans went too far, but that’s the same accusation that’s been levelled against 1D, the lotr actors and a bunch of others.

              • Ah well . . . of course, now that Anna Friel has posted those cute pics on Instagram of her and Lee kissing and then sandwiched playfully between Lee and RA, there’s more images for people to dissect . . .

              • I can’t help being cynical and assuming that the photos of Lee and Anna will be as invisible to some people as Anna Capper at the premiere of Into The Storm.

              • As I have said, people see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear—a sort of selective hearing and vision disability. I alternate between being amused and exasperated. Football season is about to get underway here again and I am dreading certain Auburn and Alabama fans who see the fans of the other team as being obnoxious and unreasonable and bad sports. The truth is, there are obnoxious, unreasonable rotten sports who cheer for both AU and UA. And I don’t care to associate with those kinds of fans, period. It’s ridiculous and sad how far some fans, whether of a sports team, a celebrity or a TV show, etc., will take their obsessions.

              • ‘people see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear, a sort of selective hearing and vision disability. I alternate between being amused and exasperated.’ It’s all very 2003 right now in RA fandom, and I wish I could muster some amusement but I’m tired of it all and I just want to be able to discuss the movies, or look at the photos as just photos and not as ‘proof’ of something, or harbingers of fandom strife.

              • I know. I sort of feel as if some fans are still stuck not just in 2003, but in middle school. And I left middle school behind a LONG time ago. I have no desire to go back, either.

              • And that’s the ‘dog’ I have in this fight (as Frenz would say). Unless someone comes out and says something, fans aren’t ever going to know for certain and ruining things for everyone by tweeting to Lee to ask him if he’s dating RA, or going on a fb q&a about Halt and Catch Fire to ask if he shares clothes with Richard, or making every second discussion on every board and blog and form of social media about something neither guy wants to discuss, is just being a jerk.

                I think RA is a helluva guy and I want him to be successful and happy.

                However, being in his fandom is not being in a happy place right now, and hasn’t been for months. And I’m sorry if I ruined the mood of your post. Very sorry. I’m just so tired.

              • That’s OK, I understand your frustration. I find myself staying away from places online where I figure I am not going to feel comfortable, because for me, it’s just not worth getting aggravated. This *should* be a very joyful times for Richard’s fans, because he’s having a fantastic run of it on the London stage, with more projects on the horizon, going from strength to strength—but some fans have become joy vampires of sorts. I still find myself wanting to stand and scream, “GET A LIFE and stay out of other people’s.”

              • Oh my god YES!!
                Why can’t it be about the huge success that is The Crucible and not about who shows up to see it? Why can’t it we be speculating about how Urban and the shed crew is going to turn out, and not applying ‘fandom forensics’ to see who bought a puppy? Why can’t we be worrying about the box office for Into the Storm instead of how much time RA spent with who in NYC? Speculating about plot twists in TH BOTFA and not who boffed whom on set?
                You know, I tried to stay out of this stuff because I know how intense it can get (death threats!), but once the door is opened, the debate is like a drug. A nasty drug that makes you feel crappy no matter what side you’re on, but that you can’t walk away from, no matter how much you want to. And the problem now is that there are fewer and fewer places that you can go where the debate is not being pushed in your face.

              • I think some people must be very bored/unhappy in their own lives to feel such an overwhelming need to meticulously dissect the lives of others in this way (or maybe they are just supremely nosy). I am now working on an OT blog post about an event I covered that made me extremely happy and helped me forget my troubles and physical pain for a couple of hours. I keep returning to the photos to relive those joyous moments. I find that I HAVE to do these things for my own mental and physical health. There have been periods over the last few months when I did not have the time or energy to really keep up with everything in the fandom—and now I think that really was for the best.

              • I found a private place to be a fan while avoiding fandom drama and was very happy, but the minute anyone ventures out to get new photos or news they run into the fighting, the speculation, the stupidity. Now, the escalation of intra-fandom hostilities in the past few months has gotten inescapable. 😦
                I was reading a blog post a short while ago about how 10 years ago you had to know where to look or know that something was there to find out about fan speculation and but social media has made speculation and fan forensics mainstream. This is all too true.

              • Anna does have a pretty longstanding relationship apparently….although life is just a funny thing. Very little surprises me anymore.

                I really hope that IF anyone says “they’re just old friends, they’re showbiz people, they kiss all the time” – and I’m not saying that can’t be true – that it becomes clear that 1) it’s hard in this day and time to know anything from JUST a picture and 2) that argument could cut both ways.

              • They are old friends from their “Pushing Up Daisies” days. But I have decided, SH, a lot of people have already made up their minds one way or another and “neither the twain shall meet.” What I find upsetting are those who keep insisting RA has been “lying” to everyone for years and trying to hoodwink them. Even if he is involved in a romantic relationship with LP, this doesn’t mean he hasn’t had romantic relationships with females in the past, or even thought about marrying and having kids. There *is* such a thing as a person blooming late into their sexual identity, too. I guess I just like RA so much, the person I perceive him to be, that I really dislike people saying disparaging things about him. There I go into Armitage Protection Mode! LOL Anyway I am a fan for life.

              • ‘Even if he is involved in a romantic relationship with LP’
                To me these photos have still left it very much in the speculative realm as to what’s going on in the present. As to what went on in the past, like you I choose to believe that he’s truthful. I certainly don’t think that getting angry about someone lying when there is no proof that they lied is reasonable. What is disturbing to me is the quickness with which one photo has moved some fans through a continuum of trust to anger, as if they were teenagers to get angry when they discover that a celebrity crush has a girlfriend: ‘he lied to me when he said he didn’t have a gf’. RA fans are generally older and I presumed they wouldn’t react this way to something that’s not even a proven fact, just an assumption based on photos and a few sightings and bolstered by rumors spread by other fans. Now I can see some of them reacting like jealous teenagers even if RA turns up with a female.

              • I am trying to be reasonable and fair-minded about all this (you know, like a good Libra LOL) Cill, but I confess it is getting harder and harder for me. Probably in part because physically it’s been something of a struggle for me of late, and I feel a bit grouchy and tetchy. It happens.

                I just don’t think there’s been some sort of nefarious conspiracy from the early days of RA’s career to “put one over” on an unsuspecting female public and sell a load of lies. To me that is ludicrous. Heck, when he tried to be a bit candid about his private life, some people harped over and hammered him for that. No wonder he clammed up.

                I believe someone, a fan come lately, cried (after all this about RA and Lee started cropping up and being circulated) “To think I wasted six months of my life on this man for nothing” I *hope* that was a young immature fan because otherwise, that is one sad statement (well, it is anyway, but I make allowances for youth and shallowness/stupidity). Actually, I have seen women I know are old enough to know better make catty statements about actresses posing with RA on red carpet and suggest they should keep their hands off RA—and they aren’t kidding, either. There is definite jealousy and mean-spiritedness there and that is needless. So if he did make it clear he was involved with a woman and her identity was made public, oh, the poor thing. Some fans will apparently never be happy unless he’s only available to THEM (hmmm, how likely is this??) or he’s completely unavailable because he’s gay (and thus they demand he BE GAY, dammit!). How about just being happy the man exists and wanting him to be happy, too?

              • Right, I knew they were both on Pushing Daisies. And yes, how foolish for people to say “he lied to us”, as if it were all about them (the fans) rather than him and his life! If there’s a way to be selfish about this, it seems like some people will find it!

                To your other point, I’m not sure that sexual orientation is necessarily black/white, either/or, all/none….. I’m not some kind of authority (so no one ask me for stats! I’m not a researcher!) but I aware it can be more complex or fluid than that, in different respects. Like you, I think I’m hooked on the guy too! – whatever his private life, he’s still an amazing actor and a sweetheart, and I don’t think I’m able to bail out at this point (nor do I really want to 🙂

              • @SH, I am afraid I am not very sympathetic with those who are so upset and feel ill-used when they even consider the idea he might not bat for the same team they do, and I am generally quite an empathetic soul, or try to be.

                Yes, it seems selfish. Let’s be totally honest, shall we? What were the odds any of us fangurlz were going to end up in an ivy-covered cottage and a white picket fence with Richard Armitage, 2.5 adorable kiddies and an equally adorable dog? We are wonderful women, granted, but there are a lot more of us and only one of him! LOL Fantasies, in the end, are fantasies—and there’s nothing wrong with having them, as long as we also maintain a healthy hold on reality. As for one’s sexuality, the older I get the more I am convinced a lot of things in this life are not so black and white, so clearly defined. Look at Anna Paquin, who describes herself as bisexual, but fell in love with her male co-star and is married with a baby (and quick to tell you it’s a monogamous relationship, too).

                People don’t always fit into tidy little boxes. I wonder, if it’s the idea of finding a man so fanciable, so sexy and alluring who might prefer (or also like) men somehow threatening to someone’s ego or self-image? As if something is wrong with them? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that—but maybe some people do. Oh, it can get complicated, I suppose. And then we have the others who say he’s been lying all this time . . . well, I don’t think so. My gut feelings about RA are a lot better than my gut feelings about some of his “fans” . . . if you know what I mean. I will always be his fan no matter what, the dear, sweet, funny, amazingly talented and beautiful man that he is.

              • @Cill: I agree, I am certainly not prepared to say that these Anna Friel pics prove anything either way. Dynamics involved seem somewhat unusual to me, as I think about them.

                And I agree with both of you, Cill and FL, that if these bizarre jealous statements are being made by women over the age of 17 – what in Hades is wrong with them?? Yes, FL, did anyone really think they would go to the stagedoor and he would fall in love and elope with them? Or carry them off to his dressing room? (Fanfic gone loco??) We’ve discussed how celeb crushes can help us through hard times, yes! But little bells need to go off to go get professional help if someone’s that upset about this EITHER WAY. Yes, he is just a criminally sexy man, with not just animal magnetism but all that dratted HUMAN magnetism as well! He’s just so unique, I guess that’s why we’re here. But he’s still a human being with right to live his life in free choice under his God and himself, just like us. Dear, sweet Lord. I understand why some people are discouraged with the fandom but not the man.

                I forgot about Anna Paquin…. I was thinking about Anne Heche too. I don’t pay a lot of attention to this but I know I’ve heard about some show biz men getting married who were all over the map too. Clearly the old boxes don’t work anymore, and probably never did for a number of people.

              • Again, I think people are seeing what they want to see and reading into things what they want to read. Plain and simple. I have seen people insist a photo that wasn’t a manip (IMHO) PSed, and insisting photos I KNOW were manips (two people who were on opposite sides of the planet at the time magically appear at event together) are real! *sigh* This whole thing reminds me of a bunch of hormonal teenagers. When did the fandom for “Twilight” invade Armitage World?? I adore RA and I think I always will, but parts of the fandom right now? Not so much, I am sorry to say. You know, this sort of reminds me of people who get caught up in soap operas and treat the characters as real. Only in this case, we ARE dealing with real human beings, not characters to be manipulated any old way the writer wishes to do so. Real people, real lives. Not a soap opera, not a reality show.

              • ‘I adore RA and I think I always will, but parts of the fandom right now? Not so much, I am sorry to say. ‘
                I’ve already said it. RA fandom is not a fun place to be a lot of the time right now, or last year either – or maybe since the ship sailed.. I wasn’t involved in fanning activities then, and I will be frank: if I were a new RA fan who didn’t want to get caught up in drama and who was put off by the aggressive shipping on Tumblr or the fighting on IMDb, I wouldn’t join the fandom or read anywhere but the interviews.

              • JUst so everyone knows, an individual I find completely trustworthy has done some sleuthing and determined that a majority of the regrettable behavior we are seeing in the fandom is due to just one person—someone who is not only trolling, but self-trolling at IMDB and tumblr. Yes, sending herself (?) hate mail, so to speak, when enough actual fans did not respond to her baiting. I am at once relieved to discover there are not large numbers of true fans behaving this way—and appalled anyone would go to such pathological lengths to try to cause so much distress and trouble. :-/

              • That’s the way I feel—glad to know it’s not a large number of fans making a fuss; sad to think someone, anyone, would go to so much trouble. Pathological, as I said.

              • That narrows it down. There’s some others doing regrettable behavior too but maybe not self-trolling. Having seen some stuff at imdb (but not visiting tumblr) I would love to know who it is but I understand if it’s confidential.

              • Yeah, it’s what you’d call a confidential source and I’d rather not reveal it. The research that’s been done points to one particular individual who is stirring up a lot of this with a few followers and also doing the self-trolling. So I think the troublemakers are a fairly small base—although they’d certainly like you to think otherwise. Ridiculous and sad.

              • Although I’d like to believe this, in order to do so, I would like to be able to make a connection between the fb page of a certain ‘fan club’ and its whackadoodle admins who are aggressively invading people’s privacy and possibly sending stolen photos in to gossip sites, and a certain group of clothing-analysis experts from tumblr/imdb who are probably also sending in rumors.
                Or did you have something totally different in mind?

  4. Just perfect, Angie, thanks for putting these thoughts together so beautifully!
    I find the Merton quote wonderful, too, for ALL the people I love 🙂
    Wish you could start feeling better 😦 Hugs

    • Thank you, SH. I think the Merton quote can be applied in all our lives with those we love but perhaps don’t always like or agree with? I found the quote on Pinterest and it jumped off the screen and said “USE ME!” As for feeling better, now that I have most of the tests (ECV, EMG and MRI) out of the way and have a stronger prescription NSAID to take, the pain is a little better and I feel semi-hopeful they will figure something out.

      • That is great news! praying that they will do just that, figure this out!! 🙂

        Interesting re: the quote- in recent years, either I am more transparent or my war deepens with my inner control freak (aargh! or both). Really, with ALL those I love most, I realize that what they need most from me is that freedom / safety net to be themselves, with knowledge that I will still be there. And my recognition that “themselves” may be different from who it was last week, last month, last year or last decade. And I guess I need that too. Merton just expressed that and more in such a thought-provoking way – just as you did regarding Richard. Again, bravissima & I wish the whole fandom could read this. (And I bet Richard would like it too 🙂

        • Thanks, SH. I remember going through a terrible time of worry about Benny when he was flying as support personnel with the Looking Glass missions back in his AF days—somehow, I kept obsessing over the plane having technical difficulties, of crashes, all kinds of possible scenarios—I finally realized that to keep my sanity and his intact I had to let go. And just trust that all would be well . . . he was doing something he really enjoyed and it was part of protecting our country. But sometimes knowing what we should do/how we should behave and actually doing it can be hard. And then when my parents were dealing with ill health and I wanted to wrap them in bubble wrap and protect them from all harm—and it was so hard to watch them become increasingly frail and to see devastating things happening. It’s a painful time of life, trying to be strong for them when you feel as if you just want to fall apart.

          • Ah, cheers to your AF man! I have had some wonderful AF friends over the years because of where I live (not to pin it down too close)….Love love love the AF and their families! It can be a really hard path to walk, and we should appreciate all of you more than we do.

  5. This is beautiful, Angie–thank you. You said it far more perfectly than I could and put feelings that I have a hard time expressing into wonderful words.

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